top
References:

Books/publications that serve as reference material for our various tutorials.

quantum
The God Effect —Brian Clegg

Brian discusses quantum mechanics and entanglement theory using lay language; its implications when applied to interpersonal communication are mind boggling. 

For example:  A proton that has been paired with another and is then separated (by one foot or millions of miles) changes its spin when its partner has been observed; they communicate with each other without wires or radio waves or any known transmission medium. It just happens automatically and instantaneously (as in faster than the speed of light).  Einstein referred to this phenomenon as "spooky."

Entanglement explains the phenomenon in which once one partner decides to withhold a thought from the other, it automatically (instantaneously) creates the other withholding his/her thought of choice. In other words, withholding a thought determines whether or not you'll be relating with someone of similar values.

For example: Let's assume that before you met your partner you used to operate from integrity, you could be trusted to communicate openly, honestly, and spontaneously most of the time, and that when you met your partner they too were equally candid. And then, you opted (consciously chose) to withhold a thought from them—always for a "good" reason. The effect this had was that immediately (instantaneously), without them even knowing why, they found themselves withholding a thought from you.  In other words, you changed their value (the direction of spin so to speak) simply by observing them, by communicating with them. To survive in your presence they had no choice but to "spin" as you do.

The book compliments the premise that communication is a function of intention, not words, that communication is generated (called forth-created) from potential (euphemistically referred to as space) whereas talking (that which we do 99.9% of the time) comes from some thing, the mind.

Simply inspiring!

crying
The Aware Baby —Aletha Jauch Solter

One of the few books that truly effects behavior. Although it appears to be about parenting it applies to all interpersonal interactions. The fundamental principles for relating with children, parents, grandparents, and others are the same.

The essence of the book: When your baby is crying intend for him/her to cry; this, rather than try to get him/her to stop. Babies are integrity meters. At the moment of conception (sentience) a baby inherits the incompletes of both parents. He/she is then, throughout pregnancy, exposed to everything, all conversations, verbal and nonverbal, that take place between parents, all news reports (the condition of the planet and its wars), all communications—the loving communications and all the unconscious put-downs, make-wrongs, and condescensions between parents. A baby can sense when one parent is withholding something (a thought or perpetration). It bothers the baby because the withhold is serving as a barrier to the experience of love—the way it was at least once before. When the experience of love is missing between the three it hurts. A baby does whatever it takes to restore the experience of integrity (love). Crying is one way of drawing attention to an out-integrity—be it the wars or the unresolved squabbles/disatisfactions between parents. Shushing or distracting (pacifier, bouncing, etc.) causes the baby to stuff the upset, the anger, the incomplete, until later, typically during the teenage years. Sometimes getting sick or misbehaving is the only way to draw attention to the out-integrity of a parent.

A baby who is lovingly supported in crying, expressing sadness, grief, or rage, won't have to dramatize such emotions later as an adult.

intention
The Intention Experiment —Lynne McTaggart

"Using Your Thoughts to Change Your Life and the World"

An engaging participatory book that examines with the reader the effects of intention on matter. It leaves no doubt in one's mind that thoughts do have an effect, on oneself, and others, and on supposedly inanimate objects.

The book describes the amazing research (with surprising results) that's been done with remote healing—the receiver in one city, the healer in another. And, what many gamblers already know—how your mind can effect the roll of dice.

The book includes exercises pertaining to intention and an opportunity to participate (via the Internet) in world-wide experiments having to do with intention.

A must for anyone intent on mastering communication.

Additional thoughts about remote healing research.*

integrity
A New Model of Integrity: An Actionable Pathway to Trust, Productivity and Value —Werner Erhard (founder of est Erhard Seminars Training, an Independent), Michael C. Jenson (Harvard Business School), Steven Zaffron (Vanto Group, The Forum)

The Harvard Law School’s Seminar in Law, Economics, and Organization, Professor Michael Jensen and Werner Erhard presented a paper on integrity that they co-authored with Steve Zaffron.

The presentation of the paper was given in 2007. The paper is not written for the lay person however its significance cannot be underestimated. It represents a shift in consciousness within academia, at the very top. It's possibly the first time such a prestigious body of intellects, other than professional workshop facilitators, have acknowledged integrity as a communication variable.

"In summary, we show that defining integrity as honoring one's word."

Read the text of the presentation.

Read the text of the paper.

feedback

* Additional thoughts about remote healing research:

Feedback about intention research described by Lynne McTaggart in her book The Intention Experiment

The book describes numerous researches about remote healing (healing via intention). The results are surprising. The book reveals that it's extremely difficult to measure the effectiveness of healers be they a Reiki practitioner, a psychic, or a minister sending prayers.  The following feedback discusses some fundamental communication principles as they apply to healing.

In experiments attempting to discover what’s so about remote healing via intention there are four intentions that affect an outcome;

• the intention of the healer
• the intention of the recipient (the ailing person)
• the intention of the researcher
• you the reader's intention (where you are about the possibility of remote healing) Yes, as always you have an effect on what's "happening" around you.

It could be said that in all instances of failed healings the healer and recipient were at cross-purposes; there was no experience of alignment, of communication. Actually, communication did take place; both the healer and the receiver communicated [non-verbally] to the other, "We need to have more communications to produce healing. There are too many considerations in the space." Unacknowledged considerations serve as barriers to the experience of communication, of manifesting ones stated intentions.

For example: If the receiver's illness began when they blamed their ex for cheating and they haven't acknowledged to their ex, or themselves, that it was abusive of them to blame/badmouth another, then it's possible that the illness is a consequence of an unacknowledged perpetration; in which case healing can't take place until the receiver acknowledges his/her cause in the matter. Conversely, if the healer doesn't get into communication with the recipient and support the recipient in recalling what thoughts come to mind about the illness (what it might be about) then the healer is ignoring the unconscious intention of the receiver to be acknowledged for a previous unacknowledged abuse or for life's unacknowledged perpetrations. The premise being: Life's unacknowledged perpetrations have consequences effecting ones aliveness, eventually one's very health. These unacknowledged perpetrations are referred to as incompletes. Incompletes serve as barriers to communication, to manifesting ones stated intentions. "Stated" here meaning that what one says they want is often a lie (more accurately, it's just a want).  i.e. I say I want to have six-pack abs again but I still have a pot belly. In other words, I have yet to formulate an intention to manifest six-pack abs.

While it is natural to assume that a healer’s intention is always to heal, we can only be certain of this when healing takes place. A healer discovers his/her intention by looking at the results. As pertains to entanglement theory, the healer determines the valance of the receiver, no matter the distance, by observing. The healer cannot know the outcome until they observe it. To know the outcome is to be clear about ones intentions; to do this one must be able to recreate the receiver’s condition (his/her communications).

A researcher merely discovers what they intended but did not know they intended until they tally the results. They must begin with the acknowledgment that they cannot conduct unbiased research, that they have an unconscious agenda discovered only at the end.

When a person is experiencing poor health, he/she has most always spent a lifetime manifesting this condition (cancer, back pain, migraine headaches, etc.). Seldom are they aware that the aliment is a manifestation of their intention, most always an expression of their integrity. The ailment serves a purpose. It supports one in first cleaning up life’s incompletes and perpetrations so as to eliminate integrity as possibly being the source of the unwanted condition.

If the recipient lies (to themselves or the healer) and says they want to heal when in fact they haven’t gotten to the source, the cause, then it's unlikely that permanent healing will take place.

If a healer has yet to master communication, if he/she does not have the ability to create an experience of communication (open, honest, and spontaneous communication, zero thoughts withheld) with the recipient, then the results will reveal the unconscious intentions of both.

Many enablers have tried to "heal" an alcoholic only to discover later that they were unconscious and could not recreate the alcoholic’s non-verbal communications, specifically, that he/she had no intention of healing. Interestingly, at the start of the healing agreement/program both honestly and sincerely believed that they were intent on succeeding.

This feedback uses the communication model in which intention is determined by the results. For example: If a friend doesn't return a tool per their "agreement" then no matter what I believe, or the words used when creating the agreement, it was not my intention for the tool to be returned on time. With this model there is no blame. In truth, I only created an "imitation of an agreement." When agreements are co-created (communicated) they are honored (here's more about agreements).

To post comments about the above feedback.

Return to The Clearing House

Return to Communication Skills Tutorial for Managers

top